Easter with the Egg Bunny Army

2014 Easter

Pte. Edward Hare of the Royal EBA (Egg Bunny Army) is one of many young rabbits busying himself this week with Easter preparations. He, with several other highly trained bunnies, is on security detail in the Master Egg Room where the year’s supply of rotund cocoa-based treats is stored; some 50 feet below an oak tree beside the vegetable patch.

skip_rope_1500

Piggy in the Middle

A little bit of piggy in the middle… of the week! Hello Wednesday, you horrid thing. I’ve been having enormous dramas with the site lately – it’s sluggish and impudent. The menus don’t do anything I tell them to, and all the posts are higgledy-piggledy. Not to mention all the images that have taken off on the hoof; I can’t find them! Gallery after gallery just… gone.

Big Pig Rig, hard at work.

London Stationery Show · April 1st & 2nd

London Stationery Show, April 1st & 2nd 2014 – Artline will be on Stand M709. Come along for your chance to win a signed scribblegraph print! And make sure you say hello to Grace who will be there to tell you all about Artline pens. Ask about the “EK-231″ for bonus points!

scribblegraph_wp_discovery

the Ides of March scribblegraph Wallpaper Pack

Normally these would be filed away under Members Only Downloads – however, I’m well sleepy after a stupendously gluttonous birthday feast, and I’m still not in my right mind. So, I’ve decided to just give these away to anyone & everyone who wants them.

Sus scrofa Bankus - the young piggy bank gang

Piggy Bank

I took Friday off and left Yoon-Mi in charge of the sandwich bar (risky: she often eats more than she sells!) and went out to a local piggy bank farm. All the piglets were out in the sunny weather, enjoying a bit of kite flying, playing at marbles and having a good ol’ mud bath.

"Le mantra de la souri"

Le mantra de la souris

“The Mantra of the Mouse” – The very short tail of François Begnaud du Moule (Noblesse d’épée) – a Parisian mouse in London.

Never trust a skinny chef

Greedy Pigs

It was the best of thymes, it was the worst of thymes… so spake the greedy pigs!

Artline Droid model EK-231

Artline Droid model EK-231

If an ‘EK-231′ sounds like someone R2D2 and C3PO might hang out with on boys’ night – that’s because it’s exactly what an EK-231 is.

Dr. Geoffrey P. Nutterbolt (robot)

The Macabre Foundry of Dr. Geoffrey P. Nutterbolt

Inherent to the human condition is the inability to predetermine whom we will fall stupidly in love with. Us sapiens have written tome upon tome on the subjects of romance, dating, life companionship, compatibility, marriage, surviving divorce, finding someone new, how to choose authentic French linen in a world full of convincingly well-crafted knock-offs… and none of it gets anyone any closer to having an answer.

I just need someone I can connect with.

Making a love connection

Hoping to make a connection in a world utterly saturated with all-that-glitters seems a desperately futile task. Our attention span is becoming increasingly narrow, and the sheer amount of awesome required to truly impress people is, quite frankly, ridiculous. But this might get their attention.

Love flows better with Artline

Love flows better with Artline

…these things just kind of leak out when I take the lid off. Today I found the LoveBot mk.IV hidden away in an old 0.1 I left under my keyboard. He kind of just eeked out looking all frantic and frazzled, like he had something important to tell someone. Then the the girl kind of just started soaking into the page, and it was pretty clear what his problem was.

All hail Colin "Neptune" Barnett

Shameful Shark Cull in Western Australia

All hail Neptune Barnett! » “WA Premier Colin Barnett has said he is “pleased” to see the controversial catch-and-kill order policy begin after the first shark was killed on Sunday morning.” (WA’s baited drumlines kill first shark on Australia Day)

The-Aviator

The Aviator

We skipped from could to cloud, landing regularly for picnics (consisting largely of a lovely Narwhal gnocchi I was fond of at the time) and made it to my rendezvous with a contact in Nogliki who ran a little submarine that took me out into the Sea of Okhotsk… I’ve said entirely too much.

sandpit_2400

What do boys know, anyway?

I can absolutely remember the first time I looked at a girl and liked her. Like, LIKE liked her. This was quite a revelation to me because, just moments before, the sum total of my feelings for her were the desire to bury her in the sand pit and surround her with sweets to see if ants would eat her and, if they did – how long until there was just a skeleton left? Then I’d own a skeleton! Epic!

twentyk

20,000 Visitors

From small beginnings scribbling declarations of love, to illustrating for a wedding and starting my own narwhal steak eatery – from the very first of my visitors to today – there have been a multitude of crazy stories, some of them were even made up.

thedistantheart

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

Scientists that do mind-bonkingly difficult things with numbers on dusty blackboards go ON AND ON about distances. Interstellar distances , they burble through be-tangled mustachios, are SO vast that light itself packs a pretty hefty cut lunch before it sets off. Then for the nonce, the BASTARD scientists pop an LED-encrusted helmet and a webcam on a little droid and shoot it DIRECTLY INTO the vastly dark, silent freezing nothingness on a one way journey to the place where time began. And if you read the right type of journal, they tell you how its feeling about the diode-crushing isolation for months and months before it stops talking to us at all. Not because it dies, but because there is NO COMING BACK. It just goes on & on & on FOR EVER…

Halloween Twenty·13

Halloween Twenty 13

Happy Halloween twenty thirteen! I’ve had somewhat of a difficult day, what with my girlfriend eating my brains and all. I had just made a toasted Camembert sandwich and was about to feed the pumpkin beast when hey ho, she lops my head in half and downs my cerebellum with a spork. Typical!

Belladonna Bubble

Halloween Twenty Thirteen

This is a brief introduction to Belladonna Bubble, Miss halloween Twenty Thirteen. I would like to tell you that Belladonna Bubble is a good girl, or at least that she has a good heart even though she is quite often less than good. Neither of those things is even remotely true.

Summer, part one

Summer Memories

Later in the day, every kid in the street would be gathered together in one arbitrary yard, with every length of available hose like hatch-work over driveways; all these kids running about excitedly on the precipice of a gargantuan take-no-prisoners water fight.

Bunnyfolk Lore

Viking Bunnyfolk Lore

Why was I in Iceland, I hear you implore me to hurry up and explain? Well, my reasons were deux. Firstly, to visit the lovely people of Eyjafjallajökull for no other reason than to establish, once and for all, how one is supposed to pronounce Eyjafjallajökull. (…read on)